Call whine one one and ask for a waaaambulance.

Kelly: "Jack would like to see you, Commander."
Shepard: "Shit."

Jack: "I've got thoughts, like little bugs crawling around in my head."
Shepard: "Wah, wah, wah. I've got a whiny punk, like a little bug crawling around in my ship. What do you want?"
Jack: "Cerberus did experiments on me. They drugged me, tortured me. Whatever chance I had to be normal, they stole from me by trying to turn me into a super-biotic. The doctors, the other kids, they all hated me. They let me suffer."
Shepard: "And now you're a super-biotic. Cerberus lured thresher maws to my units' position. Out of the fifty Marines there, I survived, along with Corporal Toombs, who was captured by Cerberus. He went insane. They put thresher maw acid in his veins. I have nightmares of my fellow Marines getting ripped to shreds. Every night. I don't shave my head or go berserk with the ink. I deal with it."
Jack: "There was some kind of emergency. I got out. Everyone tried to stop me; the other kids, the guards. I killed everyone in my way and ran. I was picked up by slavers. They used me, then they sold me. There's my uplifting escape story."
Shepard: "Batarian slavers attacked my home. They killed my parents, my brother and sisters, and everyone I knew. At least, I hope they did. I met a girl they captured. She blew her brains out right in front of me. And besides, why didn't you just use your super biotic powers to kill the slavers that tried to use you? You fought your way out of a Cerberus base, but then got pwned by some two bit slavers? Whatever."
Jack: "I want to go to my cell and set a big bomb and set it off and watch from orbit!"
Shepard: "Well, you're batshit insane, but Cerberus deserves it. Fine."

(After the mission)

Shepard: "So, it seems Cerberus used the other kids as test subjects so they wouldn't hurt you. Dozens of children were murdered to keep you safe as they made you into uberbiotic. How does that make you feel?"
Jack: "No! No one had it worse than me! I'm the most shit-on little girl in the whole wide galaxy!"
Shepard: "Whatever you have to tell yourself to keep yourself half-sane. Anyway, you're the one who wants to live in the bilge with the leaky sewer pipes. Don't pester me again."